Although I’m not 100% well. I’m working on myself. I want to take this time around to be honest at therapy and not just minimize and saying “it’s okay” or “it will work itself out”. I need to be honest and I need to be vulnerable.
I’m applying to jobs (just because I know how long it takes to get one these days) that are creative and will allow me to express myself.
No matter what, I can’t have any regrets. My life is how it is. My illness is what it is. I’m here and I’m alive and that’s honestly a miracle.
I’m moving forward every day even in the smallest manner. I count not going to spin class because I’m so exhausted as a win. I listened to my body and I told myself, with compassion, that it’s okay.
I didn’t go to program today because I got extremely intoxicated. That’s another thing I need to work on, my drinking.
Every day I have more to learn and more ways to grow. It’s scary when you’re in a city where your family is far away and it’s scary when you don’t know what the future is. But I’m going to keep on keeping on.
That’s the only way we can survive. And that’s the only way we can not only prove to ourselves, but prove to others that living with dismantling and catastrophic mental illness is possible.
Thank you to everyone who has supported me through my rough times. Happy Monday. There are so many opportunities that lie ahead for us this week
Xoxo as always,