“And yet you are all that you have, so you must be enough. There is no other way.” – Marya Hornbacher
I’ve gotten better at this. I try to remind myself of this mantra, day in and day out. “You are enough”
The only thing I can do is control the controllables.
I worked 9.5 instead of my usual 10 hours, yesterday, it’s enough.
I only swam half the distance I planned to, it’s enough.
For weeks, I stopped blow drying my hair for work in the morning, wet hair has to be enough.
I cancelled a physical therapy session because I needed the time for my move and mental sanity, it’s got to be enough.
Day in and day out, I’m faced with choices. Of course, it’s necessary to push yourself and be uncomfortable through certain things.
But for me, I’m learning my limits. I’m figuring out what is manageable and what is simply a recipe for disaster.
It’s hard though! I want to do it all. I woke up at 445am to go to the gym, to go to work, to meet my mom, to stay in a hotel, to move, to have a psych appt tomorrow, to get my bed delivered, to have my movers come, to buy the necessities for my apt to pick up my dad, etc , etc.
Everyone has this, it’s life. But I’m learning to pull back and I’m learning when it’s okay to say no.
I have to let it be enough.